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Roasty Toasty Ghosty
Roasty Toasty Ghosty — The comedy class no one asked for, and everyone needs.
Each week, Lauren and Mattias “teach” you something completely useless — from fake history lessons and chaotic crash courses to games, quizzes, and whatever else their sleep-deprived brains come up with. Think educational chaos… but make it funny.
Roasty Toasty Ghosty
[Outtakes] #72
This episode is only available to subscribers.
Roasty Toasty Ghosties
Support the show & get subscriber-only content.Ever found yourself red-faced over a caps lock crisis or stumped by the mysteries of a barcode scanner? Well, buckle up and join us as we unravel the comic absurdity of these digital age blunders. With no guests to interrupt our flow, we dive headfirst into the laughable labyrinth of technical hiccups. From amplifying burps to the zero that unlocks scanning success, we recount the tiny triumphs and face-palm moments that pepper our wired world. It's a candid look at the silly side of tech troubles, complete with workplace tales that prove sometimes, the simplest answer is the one that's hardest to see.
Strap in for a detour through the random and the nonsensical, where our chatter wanders from work dynamics to the peculiar segment pitches that could scare off our future guests. Think your life's become a snooze fest? We challenge that notion with our own dose of quirky humor and questionable storytelling skills. We'll reminisce on the martial arts mastery of "Enter the Dragon" and debate the fine art of story crafting, all while embracing the spontaneous joy of just shooting the breeze. So, if you're in need of a good chuckle or a momentary escape from the gravity of the everyday, you've found your refuge right here with us.
Don't miss this heartwarming and funny episode of Roasty Toasty Ghosty - and be sure to follow and subscribe to our podcast and join us on Instagram. Trust us, you'll want to be part of our crazy journey as we navigate life's ups and downs together.
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Beginning music - Energetic Prog Rock from AdobeStock
Intermission & ending music - Marshmallow Overload by Avocado Junkie
The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.
Neither hosts are scientists or historians and all content displayed is strictly for entertainment purposes only. Simply put, not a single word spoken in this podcast is or should be taken seriously.
No ghosties were harmed in the making of this podcast.
Technical Difficulties in Communication
Speaker 1This way, you can hear me also. But I wanted to hear you.
Speaker 2I only wanted to hear me.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's true, I'll fix it for you.
Speaker 2Thank you.
Speaker 1You're welcome.
Speaker 2Hello.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2Sorry.
Speaker 1Perfect, you got my burp there.
Speaker 2Really loud. Okay, can you burp?
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2It's not going to make a difference here, oh Okay.
Speaker 1Can you burp?
Speaker 2No, it's not going to make a difference here. Oh Okay, good job.
Speaker 1Okay, so it's only in.
Speaker 2It's only in our ears that it gets louder.
Speaker 1Am I talking or?
Speaker 2You're Matias.
Speaker 1Yeah, no, no, you're Paul.
Speaker 2Yep, okay, okay. Okay, okay that you have to cut. Okay, um, you're a bad influence on me, you've changed the way. I think okay, and um you. I don't know if you know, but sometimes when you scan the um non-books like toys and stuff.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2The scanner, uh like cuts out the zero at the front or at the beginning. Yeah, I don't know, maybe.
Speaker 1Yes, I don't know Okay.
Speaker 2So then you have to like push in the zero and then scan it. Yes, okay. So then you have to like push in the zero and then scan it. And I was trying to figure out how to use the program that we use and she was like why are these toys not scanning in? Like they're not. We're not getting results when we search for the things.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And you know she works with Sata. You know toys and stuff, yes, oh, we come there. Yeah, and you know she works with um.
Speaker 1What's that? Yeah, you know toys and stuff. Yes, oh, we come there, yeah.
Speaker 2So she like deals with this stuff all the time, mm-hmm, and I get like really nervous. I'm like I'm sorry if this is a stupid question, but did you try putting in a zero first?
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2I was like so nervous asking, I was waiting for her to be like duh obviously I did that. Yeah, I was like I'm sorry, this is a really stupid question, but did you try doing that? She was like I don't know if I did. I was like just pushing the zero and then scan, and then, you know, the things came up and I was like okay and she got mad no, no, she was really happy that I could solve her problem yeah but the whole.
Speaker 1You know, I'm not stupid, kind of thing yeah, I mean, it's one thing to um to explain if they don't know yeah but, like in my case, I did know. It was just that I didn't think of it at the moment because yeah, I mean she, it was kind of like that for her too.
Speaker 2She was like oh yeah, I didn't really think of that kind of thing.
Speaker 1So she did know well, I'm sure she's aware that sometimes you have to put in in zero first okay, but she just wasn't thinking of that yeah, because you know, the thing with the, the caps lock, that happened to me before the the time. Yeah, it was like uh, you know when, when I um got back at like 2018, that um and he and I'm like it doesn't work, nothing, yeah, nothing works. So I was like, uh, we had some links at the time, uh, and and I'm like, yeah, he's not here, so I'm gonna have to wait for him to get here so he can look, and maybe I was waiting for him for like 20 minutes or something.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1And then he got there and I'm like nothing works, and then he just hmm, and then he pushed the caps lock and it worked.
Speaker 2Yeah, and.
Speaker 1I and I'm like, oh yeah, that that's a way to do it.
Random Banter and Movie Discussion
Speaker 2That's one way of doing it I guess yeah, I mean I've done the same thing, yeah like panic because it's like nothing's working yeah and yeah, like I did the same thing with you I because you were at the machines and I was in medium yeah. I was like nothing is working. I was like Matias, come help me.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Like I know you're over there and I don't want to talk to anyone else here, like what am I doing wrong?
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2But then English came, and it was that button.
Speaker 1I was like right.
Speaker 2I knew that Because.
Speaker 1I've had the same problem in case of my yeah, stupid button, that stupid button why does it even exist and why does it even matter if it's a capital letter or not?
Speaker 2I don't know it shouldn't matter. These things are sensitive though. Yeah, it should matter no, it shouldn't, If you ask me if I would have.
Speaker 1You know what's the word I'm looking for Programmed. Programmed, the system I would have, it wouldn't have mattered. No.
Speaker 2It was like what last year or the year before we had a Timmysard you know, Christmas season.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And like no fucking kidding.
Speaker 1Wow, can I use any of this?
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1You're going to have people mad at you.
Speaker 2Yes, but they can be mad at me, because I'm mad at you for being mad at me. Everyone's mad in the end.
Speaker 1Yes.
Speaker 2This is the most important part when I eat some chocolate. Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1Is it the right place, the right microphone.
Speaker 2Something bad really happened. Something really bad happened.
Speaker 1Something bad really happened.
Speaker 2It never happened.
Speaker 1He sneezed.
Speaker 2It actually happened and it was bad. He sneezed it actually happened and it was bad.
Speaker 1He's like shh.
Speaker 2Oh my gosh yeah.
Speaker 1Okay, so we're gonna talk about what happened last. Okay, you're.
Speaker 2Sorry, no, no, no, we shouldn't record on Saturdays instead why I'm more awake than usual.
Speaker 1Yeah, but yeah, I don't know. I like to be free some Saturdays. No, yes, no, you work for me.
Speaker 2Mm, I don't know, I like to be free some Saturdays. No, yes, no, yeah, you work for me.
Speaker 1Mm, I don't Okay, so we're gonna talk about last weekend.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1And um.
Speaker 2That's the end of that. Yeah, no, the ice falling no. That you've definitely heard several times.
Speaker 1I have heard and you're going to, but the people yeah, but I need you to respond like it's the first time you're hearing this. Okay, I never heard this story.
Speaker 2You've never heard this story before. Just wipe it from your memory. Kicking, what's that? Okay, so kicking is what you do with your legs when you want to attack them. Hell, interesting. Yeah, you've never seen it before, but some people do it, yeah we've over a year.
Speaker 1We watched jackie chan movies, but I'd never seen kicking.
Speaker 2No or you saw it, you just didn't know what it was called. I guess no, exactly Like what is he?
Speaker 1doing. He does the leg movie thing. Movie thing I don't either, I think.
Speaker 2We're all out of funny stories, do.
Speaker 1I have funny stories. I don't think I have any funny stories anymore.
Speaker 2No, there's no more funny stories, no no.
Speaker 1No, it feels like all my funny stories ended a few years ago.
Speaker 2I can, I can would you say three years ago? Yeah, that's a few, yeah then, then I got boring. What have I done to you?
Speaker 1My love was just boring your. What my love? Your love, my life.
Speaker 2My love my love. Got boring yeah, non-existent.
Speaker 1No, my life. It just became boring. I don't know what happened.
Speaker 2No, I don't know either.
Speaker 1It's almost exactly three years ago, almost.
Speaker 2Almost In like a week, maybe A few days yeah.
Speaker 1Something like that. Okay, I know the date, I know the exact date when my life got boring.
Speaker 2My legs are dry. Do you want to feel my legs?
Speaker 1No, feel my leg right here.
Speaker 2Okay, ow, ow, feel my legs are dry, do you want?
Speaker 1to feel my legs? No, why Feel my leg right here? Okay, ow, ow.
Speaker 2Feel my leg right here, stop Okay. No, I said feel my leg.
Speaker 1Yeah, I do.
Speaker 2It's gross.
Speaker 1Yeah, okay, gross, that was that segment. Feel my legs.
Speaker 2Feel my legs legs all right, let's see if my legs are gross. Yeah, we should have guests feel my leg. This next segment we do with all the guests. It's called feel my leg and tell me your reaction. Feel my leg, it's pretty gross, right now. They're hairy and dry.
Speaker 1No guests ever return.
Speaker 2No, that's true, I'm pretty sure. That's why we've only had the one guest.
Speaker 1Yeah, one time Bad reviews, it was two episodes. Two episodes and that's it. Never returned. No, no.
Speaker 2She didn't, and that's it Never returned.
Speaker 1No, no, she didn't like the. She fled the country.
Speaker 2She didn't like the feel my legs segment.
Speaker 1Well, the first guest we had, he's dead. Now he's dead.
Speaker 2Oh, and the other one?
Speaker 1Yeah, that's awful You're the worst yeah I know, so mean they both were so good.
Speaker 2Yeah, is it these are on purpose pauses queen drama dolla today we watched.
Speaker 1It's almost like I'm timing yeah, the thing is uh, it's gonna uh. You know, when you do the the thing with the thing yeah, I know the pause, but it is still. It kind of holds a little bit of the pause. Yeah, okay, oh, in my I'm stumped you're a stump, stumped you.
Speaker 2You're a stump.
Speaker 1Stumped.
Speaker 2You're a tree stump.
Speaker 1Yeah, I'm stumped, stumped, stumped.
Speaker 2Yeah, you're a stampede.
Speaker 1Stump, yeah, stampede, okay, and we're leaving. Enter the Dragon for the fortieth, fortieth, forty-fourth time now. So you didn't count.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 2What TV series?
Speaker 1The one I showed you at the outlet. I actually subtitled that series to. Swedish he subtitled that series to Swedish and I had a very difficult time hearing what they were saying. Okay, Well, what he was saying, but yeah, I think it went well.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1Yeah, so we should watch that at some point, or at least you. I have already seen it and I wouldn't mind seeing it again, okay, okay 45.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's over 50 years. Yeah it. Uh, I don't know. I was gonna say something, okay, but I don't remember okay whoa, whoa, whoa'm sorry, my shoulder is itchy.
Speaker 1Yeah. So the movie starts out in black and white or something like that. It almost looks brown. I don't know Brownish, but it's black and white, brown. And then, when she comes to this new place, wizard of Oz, I guess it's Oz. Am I even pronouncing it right?
Speaker 2What Oz Oz?
Speaker 1Yeah, something like that, yeah yeah, I'm not sure about the color movies, but was this like one of the earlier color movies? But was this like one of the earlier color movies? Do you know about that? I wish I knew more about movies.
Speaker 2I don't remember when colored movies came out movies before this that had color.
Speaker 1but I think this might have been like one of the first popular color movies. I think this might have been like one of the first popular color movies. I'm not sure. I you know.
Speaker 2Sorry, now I have to know.
Speaker 1Yeah, I also want to know.
Speaker 2I have to know.
Speaker 1Yeah, so of course I'll let you.
Speaker 2Thank you.
Speaker 1I'll let you know. It sounded like I was gonna say that Of course I will let you know.
Speaker 2List of early color feature films.
Speaker 1Okay, it's going to turn out to be not even close to the first ones, but no, no, no, no, no. They made 300 before this. I'm like, oh Jesus.
Speaker 2Oh, oh, you said 39?. Yeah, okay, sorry I got lost. Yeah, color films started up in the early 1900s.
Speaker 1Okay, like 39? No.
Speaker 2Well, within the first 30 years of the 1900s, because they were testing it out in like 1902. Yeah it sounded like, or maybe not like, a feature length, I don't know I I'm speculating out of the super quick skimming that I made the, I think within the first 30 years of the 19 okay.
Speaker 1So yeah, it's not the first one, but I think it might have been one of the first popular, really popular ones, and that's my truth and I'm sticking to that.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1Go ahead and do that. I think that.
Speaker 2Okay, you just want to feel like you're right. Yeah, all right.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, welcome back. Lauren isn't here. She's peeing right now, so I'm just gonna talk a little bit and I'm gonna tell her no, I'm not Well, I'm doing the editing this week. Damn it. Damn it. Well, I know Lauren's gonna listen to this anyway. So if you hear this, lauren, maybe you should text me the word Damn it, matthias. Okay, bye.
Speaker 2Okay, after my very attractive sounds there, yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Feel this leg. Oh, is that a bruise yeah, om, om, om, om, om. Feel this leg. Oh is that?
Speaker 1a bruise. That's a tattoo.
Speaker 2I think there's a bruise here, though it looks like.
Speaker 1Ah, it should be up there. Bruised knee.
Speaker 2I have this one.
Speaker 1Oh, bruised knee. Bruised knee, music and stuff and all that History lesson later Later Now. Music and stuff and all that history lesson later later now. What do you have for now? I don't have anything for now, but is history lesson right now? Is that good?
Speaker 2good, do you have other things in mind?
Speaker 1I don't why, because I don't. I haven thought about it. Do you have anything in mind?
Speaker 2Well, we could talk about things that we could do. Okay, you go first.
Speaker 1Are we going to do the things we're talking about, or are we just going to say things?
Speaker 2I don't know what's the plan Talking All right. Well, we're doing pretty good so far.
Random and Nonsensical Banter
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, we're talking, quite talking. We have been talking quite a bit today yeah, we have said some words yeah and nothing um you know, very not worthy. We're not worthy yeah no, uh, you know nothing of uh you, yeah sorry, yeah no it's something like that. It's not the word I was thinking of, but I know I yeah nothing of use, nothing, that pikachu no, that's something something said in the Holocaust.
Speaker 2This was not what I meant when, I said talk about something.
Speaker 1Pikachu.
Speaker 2Awful.
Speaker 1Yeah, I know why I'm going to cut it. I'm going to burn it.
Speaker 2Or gas it no, stop, not funny.
Speaker 1I'm going to fart on it. Oh my gosh, that's the thing, machias?
Speaker 2No stop, not funny, I'm gonna fart on it. Oh my gosh, that's the thing my PS Gross.
Speaker 1Yeah, good joke, but no, I can't keep it. Yeah, okay, stubborn childish fat.
Speaker 2Doesn't matter.
Speaker 1None of it. The fat part doesn't matter, okay, okay.
Speaker 2I don't want to start anything. No, I'm asking you to To say Okay, it's a good test to see words.
Speaker 1Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 2Yeah, your temper.
Speaker 1I'm tempered.
Speaker 2No, test your temper. Oh, okay, I'm tempered. No, test your temper.
Speaker 1Oh, okay.
Speaker 2I'm pampered.
Speaker 1Yeah, now I'm pissed.
Speaker 2Wow, wow.
Speaker 1Yeah, that has the same intensity as pissed Sure. Why don't I, why do you?
Speaker 2sometimes, Tomorrow, sure, you know why don't I? Why are you sometimes Tomorrow? Yeah, ever.
Speaker 1Day after. Is that a good topic?
Speaker 2I don't know, we'll see. Yeah, remember to include the rock, okay.
Speaker 1You want the no, I can't Nothing. No, no, you can't no, no, you like the first three letters very much, but no, oh, no, no, that's not it?
Speaker 2no, it's not. You're dumb, that's the other thing oh yeah, that's a word. You're not dumb though stupid, you're stupid, you're stupid, which is worse than dumb. No, no, no, no, sorry, stumpied, yes, what did I say?
Speaker 1No, I bonked my head. The friend came back and Was asking about the name.
Speaker 2Yeah Asking about the name and but yeah, other than your weird mouth noises.
Speaker 1No, that's what I was thinking. No, you made a sound at the beginning of the episode. You made a sound at the beginning of the episode and I was thinking that should be what you should tell the people. Now I don't remember what the sound was.
Speaker 2You have it on recording.
Speaker 1Yeah, okay, you should say this
