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Roasty Toasty Ghosty
Roasty Toasty Ghosty — The comedy class no one asked for, and everyone needs.
Each week, Lauren and Mattias “teach” you something completely useless — from fake history lessons and chaotic crash courses to games, quizzes, and whatever else their sleep-deprived brains come up with. Think educational chaos… but make it funny.
Roasty Toasty Ghosty
[Leftovers] #116
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Beginning music - Energetic Prog Rock from AdobeStock
Intermission & ending music - Marshmallow Overload by Avocado Junkie
The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.
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Diet Pact and Impulsive Decisions
Speaker 1Hello.
Speaker 2Hello.
Speaker 1Hello, hello.
Speaker 2Oh, hello.
Speaker 1Very good, hello, hello, hello, hello.
Speaker 2Hello and welcome to Roasty Toasty Ghosty.
Speaker 1Oh, we're starting.
Speaker 2No, because I'm not the one starting.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2You didn't even open. No, no, it was a warm-up opening Okay. Sorry, I'm going to spread you.
Speaker 1You're warming up for next week. Yeah, okay, I'm preparing. Yeah, it's good to be prepared. I heard get my act together yeah, that's good rehearsals you should always be prepared I'm prepared yeah at least I know what I'm doing next. Hmm, wonder what that can be.
Speaker 2I said that I know, but I don't actually know.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2I have to write it up.
Speaker 1Okay, my script yeah.
Speaker 2Or outline Hmm. And then I'll know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1Hmm.
Speaker 2It's going to be difficult to not repeat myself, hmm, but I feel like I might repeat myself a little bit. Okay, at least 1% will be repetitive.
Speaker 1Yeah, from the previous years. Yes, I wonder what you're talking about.
Speaker 2I don't know Next week.
Speaker 1Yeah, next week You'll have to find out.
Speaker 2Yeah, I have things up my sleeves. Ah they are my arms.
Speaker 1Ah, okay, you don't have cards there.
Speaker 2No, I have hair, though.
Speaker 1Hair there Right here Hair right here.
Speaker 2Hair here.
Speaker 1Now it's there Ah there, there, hair there, hair there.
Speaker 2Hey Jude, Don't let me down.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 2Take a sad song and make it better. Remember Whatever is in your heart. Then you can start To make it better.
Speaker 1Yeah, I forgot the lyrics to that one. I know the lyrics when you sing it.
Speaker 2So run it out and let it in. Hate to begin the lyrics when you sing it. So run it out and run it in. Hey to begin. You can't ever find your soul.
Speaker 1Yeah, I remember those lyrics too there are.
Speaker 2I mean, I don't know the ordning, no. I don't, yeah, I know the word in Swedish and that is more in knowing words in Swedish, but not being able to translate to English, it's a little sad.
Speaker 1Yeah, you don't know in which order. Yeah.
Speaker 2That makes sense because it's very similar to the word that I said it. And this is where I'm at. That's my status. Yeah, do you like my sweater?
Speaker 1I do.
Speaker 2It's baggy. It is, that was not intentional.
Speaker 1Okay, sure it wasn't.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1Yeah, I do like it.
Speaker 2Thank you, it's fluffy. Did you get to feel it? Yes, yes, it is fluffy. Yeah, feel do like it.
Speaker 1Thank you, it's fluffy. Did you get to feel it? Yes, yes, it is fluffy.
Speaker 2Yeah, feel it. Do it again. Ew, you ruined the moment.
Speaker 1I just threw up.
Speaker 2Ew On my sweater Gross.
Speaker 1No, I didn't.
Speaker 2You didn't throw up on my sweater.
Speaker 1No, I just burped, sorry about that.
Speaker 2You're going to be very noisy today, huh.
Speaker 1I might be Mm.
Speaker 2That's okay, I'm going to be burping a bit too.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2I ate a lot.
Speaker 1Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2Mm.
Speaker 1I also ate.
Speaker 2I also ate today.
Speaker 1Yeah, I did, I did, yeah, I did, I did. It's a true story.
Speaker 2When are we going to stop with the cycle?
Speaker 1With the eating badly.
Speaker 2I'm so sick of starting over every single week.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2It's frustrating, I mean, although the numbers are like slightly going down, For you, yeah, for me. I guess it's worse for you. Yeah, because you're in the same spot for the third week in a row. Yeah, but still it's like really frustrating starting over every single week.
Speaker 1I agree, and I'm starting to think like is it even possible to reach the goal? I?
Speaker 2mean it has to be. You already did that before.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Last year. Yeah, we need to make a pact, okay.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 2First of all, we need to fight the work, fica. I know it's easier said than done, especially when it's right there in front of you.
Speaker 1Yeah, I'm sorry, yeah, I agree, but I agree with everything you said. I agree with everything you said Okay, yeah, because, yeah, it's so good.
Speaker 2But it's not helping.
Speaker 1It's not good for us.
Speaker 2We're not getting anywhere.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2Hmm.
Speaker 1It's too bad, it's good, it's so good.
Speaker 2It really is. We can't take anymore Pika at work.
Speaker 1No, so does that mean?
Speaker 2I think the semlas are okay.
Speaker 1Okay, no candy though.
Speaker 2No, and we can't have more than one semla. No, no, and we can't have more than one seminar no A day.
Speaker 1That is true.
Speaker 2Maybe not two days in a row.
Speaker 1Did we have two days in a row?
Speaker 2I don't think so. We had one on Tuesday.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2We had two on Tuesday.
Speaker 1Oh yeah, that's true. It wasn't two days in a row, though.
Speaker 2No, we had Fika on Saturday too, and some on Friday.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Today was a bit much.
Speaker 1Yeah, I feel so too, but can I still have my chai in the mornings on Fridays?
Speaker 2That's up to you.
Speaker 1Yeah, I feel like I can.
Speaker 2I can't decide what you do.
Speaker 1No, you can't, Unless you do worse than me.
Speaker 2Right, Wait. So if I do worse than you on a Friday, I can tell you you can't have chai and we have to have tea together.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2All right, I probably won't.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2Because I don't think I'll do worse than you on a Friday.
Speaker 1No, and Not many Fridays, you know. I Well, yeah, today you no, you didn't. No, I did worse, yes, so I.
Speaker 2You went up, didn't you?
Speaker 1Yeah, I went down, yeah that's true, but my point, I don't remember my point. It wasn't much of a point, probably.
Speaker 2It was probably one somewhere.
Speaker 1Yeah, but I missed it. Okay, yeah, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2We're making a pact yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1And my point was that if you decide I'm not having chai, I might get a little bit cranky, and you don't like when I'm cranky. No, you wouldn't like when I'm cranky.
Speaker 2But then again, if you're deciding, then you could tell me that I have to have chai.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And then I would be a little bit cranky.
Speaker 1True.
Speaker 2Because then I break my fast early and then, I get hungry for the rest of the day and you destroy everything for me. True, and then I'm going to be searching that snack machine for something good.
Speaker 1So don't you start with no Okay, because you know it's going to be like a war between us, so the decision making can't be harmful.
Speaker 2No For the other person, no.
Speaker 1No, that's true. Maybe that's good, yeah, unless the person wants it to be harmful.
Speaker 2Unless you're really looking for a fight. Yeah, you're already cranky and you need me to be on your level.
Speaker 1Yeah, you get down here to my crankiness Cranky level. Okay. So yeah, new rules. Well, it's not really new rules, we came up with them.
Speaker 2It was more like basically, let's be nice to each other yeah, because otherwise it's not going to end well. No, also work, fika.
Speaker 1So that means, oh, we're not going to have fucking meetings anymore.
Speaker 2so Probably not, not much anyway.
Speaker 1No, so no candies.
Speaker 2We just have to say no, I know it's difficult, I didn't even think twice when I walked up there. No, I saw and I took without thinking so yeah, it's a lot harder than it seems. I mean, when you think about it like this, like what's so hard, just don't do it. But then, when you're actually in the moment, you do it, you do it without thinking it's just an automatic impulse yeah, it's an impulse yeah true, like pretty much every decision I make impulsive yes, I can't help it, I don't know no I don't know how to not be impulsive no I have a hard time.
Speaker 2I don't know doing what not be impulsive? No, I have a hard time. I don't know doing what normal people do. What, like plan out everything that they do. Is that what people do?
Speaker 1But you're a good planner though.
Speaker 2Yeah when I want to be.
Speaker 1Yeah, with some stuff.
Speaker 2But like when you have an impulse like, oh, I want to do this right now.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Do people like think that through?
Speaker 1I think some people do, some people have that mentality, yeah, mentality, I guess what?
Speaker 2You have one of those? Yeah, oh, thank you. I'm just not capable of doing that, I guess.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 2Or I just haven't figured out how to do it.
Speaker 1Well, I could do it. I don't know if I'm not taking this as seriously as I did, you know, 10 years ago, when I did it for real, that's when I really went in 100% losing weight, and that's where I want to be. But then again I didn't have a job back then, I could just stay at home and focus on being good, don't, you know, eat sugar or such?
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1And drink water, or, in my case, you know, bubble water.
Speaker 2Yeah. So that's what I did I did okay, so tomorrow I'll go to the gym and I'll do our new routine by myself yeah, I'm sorry, I I don't feel well I know I could just come home and do that, but it gets so warm in here and tight with the treadmill.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, you know how to do that.
Speaker 1Open first, right, then I'll do that.
Speaker 2Something like that yeah, do that Okay.
Speaker 1The N word.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1No, I'm going to get that.
Speaker 2Yes, you are.
Speaker 1Sense of direction isn't or aren't very good. Aren't, Isn't.
Speaker 2Isn't.
Speaker 1Aren't very good. Aren't Isn't, isn't Are Okay. Our sense of yeah, it's what Our sense of direction isn't very good. Was that good?
Speaker 2Yeah, sorry, you just like I started over so many times, but I kind of gave notes in the middle.
Speaker 1Okay, just trying to give you a clean cut there. Yeah, okay, so.
Speaker 2Like these random burps. You're in there. Yeah, you're welcome, matias.
Speaker 1Yeah, sorry about that Poor thing Editing this while being sick.
Speaker 2Aw, matias, but yeah.
Speaker 1Get better.
Speaker 2When you get to this part, you should text me letting me know how you're feeling.
Speaker 1Okay, okay.
Speaker 2Even if you've already told me yeah, Like I'm not feeling good, Then when you get here, you should still tell me how you're feeling.
Speaker 1You do that.
Speaker 2I'll probably be sleeping, but it it's okay, you can still text me. Okay, just the middle of the night I'm not feeling good, no when you wake up, you're like what, what? Happened. Are you okay? Did you throw up or something? Uh, okay, so that was tuesday.
Speaker 1Well, no, I'm not done here. No, but that was Tuesday.
Speaker 2Well, no, I'm not done here, no, but. That was not the end of my story. Continue with that, because I haven't paid that yet.
Speaker 1I have. Thank you, I did my part.
Speaker 2Where's my phone?
Speaker 1Is it that one?
Speaker 2No, I think I left it by the door. Okay, I'll be right back.
Speaker 1Yeah, am I pausing, okay, okay.
Speaker 2In this segment of the episode, Lauren is going to pay her parking ticket.
Speaker 1Oh, can we talk about what happened next? Yes, at least, so we get somewhere.
Speaker 2No somewhere. No, because management doesn't know what the work hours or vacations are gonna look like after we get fired yeah, but we finished work and then we got back here and what did we do here? Clear his name ah yes, oh that felt good especially if you're a girl maybe? Um, sorry, I had. I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn't think of the word um, not complimenting, what's the opposite of complimenting? Um hey google, hey google. What's the opposite of complimenting, insulting?
Speaker 1Insulting. Of course, that was what I was, yeah.
Speaker 2I should have gotten water during break. Would it be awful if I go get water?
Speaker 1No, I'm sorry, it's like I'm reading a lot.
Speaker 2I'll be right back. Yeah, welcome back, thank you. I drank three hours worth of water.
Speaker 1Keep chugging.
Speaker 2Just now. Okay, okay, almost.
Speaker 1Don't give up.
Speaker 2I got 45 minutes in. Yeah, okay, you should not give.
Speaker 1Okay, it got worse. But have a rent, an ambulance or something. It's a matter of life and death. I don't know.
Speaker 2Almost there.
