Roasty Toasty Ghosty
Roasty Toasty Ghosty — The comedy class no one asked for, and everyone needs.
Each week, Lauren and Mattias “teach” you something completely useless — from fake history lessons and chaotic crash courses to games, quizzes, and whatever else their sleep-deprived brains come up with. Think educational chaos… but make it funny.
Roasty Toasty Ghosty
#178: Rather Be Blind Than Wrong
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
We bounce from movie night chaos to a surprisingly useful fitness reset, starting with Get On Board and ending with a Rocky-inspired plan you can do without stepping into a gym. We roast the try-hard approach, build a lazy-friendly routine that actually fits real life, and admit what’s currently ruining our lives.
• glasses problems and the misery of eye exams
• weekly highlights including gymnastics and a well-timed butt fall
• Get On Board review and why it feels overdone
• spotting early Adam Sandler movie connections and familiar faces
• Rocky III review including the song and Apollo’s return
• AI-generated Rocky workout split with stamina, strength, boxing, and recovery
• why the “worst workout routine” leads to burnout and injury
• chair, couch, and bed exercises for building a daily habit
• what’s ruining our lives right now: exercise avoidance and school stress
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Beginning music - Energetic Prog Rock from AdobeStock
Intermission & ending music - Marshmallow Overload by Avocado Junkie
The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.
Neither hosts are scientists or historians and all content displayed is strictly for entertainment purposes only. Simply put, not a single word spoken in this podcast is or should be taken seriously.
No ghosties were harmed in the making of this podcast.
Cold Open And Awkward Start
SPEAKER_04In a world where everything is unscripted, this is roasty, toasty, roasty. There we go.
SPEAKER_05It's now or never.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05If we don't start now, we're never gonna we're never gonna start.
SPEAKER_04No, exactly.
SPEAKER_05It's just not gonna happen. We're gonna start this.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, we're starting this.
SPEAKER_05Oh, wait. Okay. I need to pull up uh do some pull-ups. I need to do some pull-ups first before we start this.
SPEAKER_04So you're out of breath.
SPEAKER_05Let's get this over with.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Ready? Wait. Should we do this?
SPEAKER_04I guess we have to.
SPEAKER_05Yay. Hello. And welcome to Roasty Toasty Ghosty. I am Lauren.
SPEAKER_04And I'm Matias.
SPEAKER_05We watch movies.
SPEAKER_04And then we completely lose control.
SPEAKER_05It's already a bad idea, so let's do it anyway.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05How are you doing, Matias?
SPEAKER_04I'm doing well.
SPEAKER_05Cool.
SPEAKER_04Well.
SPEAKER_05Well.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, how are you?
SPEAKER_05I'm fine. Okay. I'm good. Okay. Yeah, sure. Whatever.
SPEAKER_04Sure. Okay. If you say so.
Glasses Drama And Weekly Highlights
SPEAKER_05I can see again.
SPEAKER_04Wow.
SPEAKER_05I did get my glasses fixed, but apparently the glass is damaged, so I have to go for another eye exam. And I'm kinda sad about that.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, maybe it's your scratching on the glasses.
SPEAKER_05Well, there was something on my glasses. Like the the eye doctor, she's not an eye doctor lady. She's a glasses lady. I don't know. Uh she said that it's very likely that I see uh dead people. No.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05But it's like more fuzzy through my glasses now.
SPEAKER_04Oh, that's why I'm fuzzy.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04You see?
SPEAKER_05Uh-huh. And so that's like all I can think about now is that things aren't what they're supposed to be looking through my glasses. So I have to I have to do another eye exam and I don't really want to, because I feel so dumb when I do that.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Because I can't see anything.
SPEAKER_04Well, that's why you get glasses.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04I mean, it's not like you you're supposed to lie on the test.
SPEAKER_05Well, I I try to. I don't like getting the answers wrong.
SPEAKER_04Okay. So you're you're like uh cheating on the I try to memorize the poster before I start my test and hope for the best. So you rather be blind than wrong.
SPEAKER_05Maybe. Let's see who's the more uh stubborn person here. Yeah. I'd rather be blind than answer wrong.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Um, but yeah, that's that's how I'm doing.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05What have you been up to this last week? Uh I Do you have any highlights?
SPEAKER_04I worked for one day. Okay. That was cool. Yeah. Uh other than that, nothing much. No. I mean, not much. I uh went for walks.
SPEAKER_05But I had my gymnastics performance last weekend.
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_05And it went well. I didn't manage to do all the things that I wanted to do. And I fell on my butt once right at the end.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05But it was it was fine. I just laughed it off and it was on the air track, so it's not like I fell on hard floor.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05It was just kind of funny because I just like bounced.
SPEAKER_04I can see it, uh I can almost see it. Like uh you falling on your butt and then just walking away laughing.
SPEAKER_05That's exactly what happened. I have it on video.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_05So if you're really that interested, I can show you.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Um, yeah, that's basically what happened. Uh this week I worked a couple times and I've been going to school and stuff. That's my highlights for the week. Yeah. Uh yeah, that's all. And today's Thursday.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Again.
SPEAKER_03Again.
SPEAKER_05Again. Because we have plans for tomorrow. Yes. Friday. So it's Thursday today. It's April.
SPEAKER_03Fuzzy.
SPEAKER_05It's April 23rd. Yeah. I had to look a little bit closer to the clock. The with the time. With the time. It's April 1312. We're time traveling today.
SPEAKER_01Yes.
Get On Board Movie Review
SPEAKER_05Uh, okay, so we watched movies. Would you like to movie on?
SPEAKER_04We can movie on. Let's move on.
SPEAKER_05Let's move on and talk about movies. Because today we watched Rocky III.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05And Get On Board. Getting on board. Going overboard.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, that that was it, I think. And that's the one that we started with. So you are free to give me a bad summary.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Not the whole movie.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05A couple lines. What this movie is.
SPEAKER_04This movie is uh Adam Sanders' first movie, and they're on a boat and he wants to be a comedian. Yeah. Yeah. And then other things happen.
SPEAKER_05Right. Adam Sandler wants to be a comedian. Yeah. He has a rival.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, because he's just a waiter. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Uh okay. Do you have anything to say about the movie?
SPEAKER_04Or Ur or sh should I ask you maybe what did you think about this movie?
SPEAKER_05Given it's Adam Sandler's first movie, I'll give it some wiggle room here. Yeah. I'll forgive it a bit. It wasn't great. Sure, it was maybe a little funny, but everything was like overdone. Like trying too hard and acting's not great.
SPEAKER_04No. Um yeah.
SPEAKER_05I I have a feeling it was supposed to be that way.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I guess so. Or? Yeah I don't know. I I I uh this is the first time I s uh seeing this movie.
SPEAKER_05Oh, okay. So I didn't know that.
SPEAKER_04No, okay. Okay. So it's the first time for both of us.
SPEAKER_05Okay. What did you think about the movie then?
SPEAKER_04Um I went in with fairly low expectations, and yeah, they were kind of met. Uh good. Uh so I I didn't love this movie, but uh it had some funny moments. I mean, uh, it's still funnier than uh Punch Drunk Love.
SPEAKER_05I guess so.
SPEAKER_04I kind of thought it was interesting that they uh got a few fairly well-known names in this movie because it's uh like he said, a no-budget movie. But they got Polly from uh Rocky movies or Bert Young.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04And uh Billy Sane was there and Billy Bob Thornton. I mean, those are pretty big names.
SPEAKER_05Now they are. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04So that's kind of cool. And I I really liked that um the guy who was the bartender, he's in like all Adam Sandler's movies, and he's there from the beginning.
SPEAKER_05Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_04You know, the Bobo caddy from Happy Gilmore and Okay.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04It's fun to see that he was there from the beginning. I think he might be the first one. Like, yeah. I couldn't see anyone else that no. I don't know. No, I don't know. But yeah, uh it was okay.
SPEAKER_05You wanna know what this movie reminded me of?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Do you have a guess?
SPEAKER_04Uh yeah. Okay. I do have a guess.
SPEAKER_05Okay.
SPEAKER_04Uh I think it's City Hunter.
SPEAKER_05Yes.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05I was thinking of City Hunter this whole time.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Because I mean, he's on a boat and there were terrorists.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And uh uh it's trying really hard to be funny.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Yeah, it's uh like over the top.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Um there's something else that I mean, maybe being crazy about girls as well.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, that's true. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05There's a lot of girls in like bikinis and they were in a beauty pageant or something.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04The other comedian, or you know, so annoying.
SPEAKER_05He was really annoying.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05I agree.
SPEAKER_04I'm I'm like, there's no way people can like that guy.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_04And also the rocker guy. He was also He was also really annoying.
SPEAKER_05And it was kind of funny with the the uh comedian guy because he had gotten himself locked in the bathroom, but he didn't even bother trying to unlock the door. No. And then when the door magically opens, yeah, it still doesn't unlock. No, it just like just opens.
SPEAKER_04And and I'm like, who opened the door?
SPEAKER_05Right?
SPEAKER_04I wanted to see because uh you could see it it's uh you could see the handle going down, so someone opened it.
SPEAKER_05Someone didn't, it was supposed to be God or something, but still nobody tried unlocking the door.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05So it looked like it was locked the whole time.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Mm-hmm that was that.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. And also there's a uh reference to Rocky movies in this one, too. They had uh like a comedy boxing match or like a verbal fight, I guess, in a ring.
SPEAKER_05Yep.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, boxing ring.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, and this is what led to Happy Gilmore. Yeah. Rocky, which we also watched today.
Rocky III And The Big Song
SPEAKER_04Yeah, Rocky III.
SPEAKER_05Rocky III. Can I tell you about Rocky III?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, please.
SPEAKER_05Okay, so in this movie, Rocky is like really good, and then he's really sad, and then he uh he fights Mr. T. That's it. Yeah. Yeah. What did you think about this movie? Oh, this is the one with the song as well.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, that's important.
SPEAKER_05It's a big part of the movie, is the song.
SPEAKER_04And I can uh I'm gonna tell you that I I do like this one better than the first two.
SPEAKER_05Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Because uh this is where I got my real interest in the movies.
SPEAKER_05In Stallone?
SPEAKER_04Well, in the Rocky movies. I mean I already had my interest in Stallone before because I saw Rambo and other movies. But uh yeah, I this one is like one of my favorites. It's not the favorite of the Rocky movies, but is that the last one? No.
SPEAKER_05Okay, it's the next one.
SPEAKER_04Next one, yes.
SPEAKER_05It's the one after this next one. The next one. Yeah, next week. Number four. Who knew that number four would be the favorite? We've had conversations about sequels and such.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Which one is usually the favorite?
SPEAKER_04Usually number two, I think, for me.
SPEAKER_05Not this time. No, no, it was number four.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Uh so yeah.
SPEAKER_05Well, number four is my favorite Star Wars movie. Except it's episode one.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05So I guess whatever. Anyway.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. I do like this movie.
SPEAKER_05Okay.
SPEAKER_04And uh I I really like um that uh Apollo Creed became a good guy in this one.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, he got to come back to be good.
SPEAKER_04It's like uh Shooter McGavin and Happy Gildmore too. You know, uh so what did you think about this movie?
SPEAKER_05I enjoyed this movie as well.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05This was the better one of the three so far. Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, yeah. And like we said, uh the the song is a big reason for it.
SPEAKER_05His son doesn't really seem to have any abandonment issues.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05But we only get to see him like twice.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05So maybe there is something underlying. Yeah. He keeps abandoning his child.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. I mean, he's used to it.
SPEAKER_05I mean, he seems to have a pretty good relationship with the boy. Yeah. But I don't know. I only got to see him twice. So I guess that speaks for itself. Yeah. But yeah, it was a good movie. So one out of two is pretty good.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Uh anything else?
SPEAKER_04Uh no.
Break Then Exercise Talk
SPEAKER_05I don't think so. No. Okay. No. We're good. We're good. All right. We are going to take a break.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05And we will be back, or we will be back later with some chaos.
SPEAKER_03Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_05Sure. Okay. Alright. We'll be right back. Yeah. Yeah. And we are back. Yes. To part two. Are you ready to get buffed?
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_05Today we are talking about exercise.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Getting physical. Physical. Physical. Physical.
unknownWe're both.
SPEAKER_03Thank you, but that was the point.
AI Builds A Rocky Workout Week
SPEAKER_05Yeah, okay. Okay. So in part two, the thing we are going to learn about today. I wrote into AI. Matias wants to train like Rocky and get really fit.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05We're sticking to Rocky today. Yeah. Create a workout routine based on Rocky just for Matias. Okay.
SPEAKER_04So it remembers my DNA and everything.
SPEAKER_05Yes. Uh but we'll see what it comes up with. If it's actually based on your DNA, because I did not specify specify to refer to your DNA.
SPEAKER_01No, okay.
SPEAKER_05Okay. So if you want to train like Rocky, this is what you gotta do. Okay? Okay. I don't have the the accent.
SPEAKER_04Whatever.
SPEAKER_05What you gotta do.
SPEAKER_04Oh yes. Okay. I'm still alone and I talk like the You don't wanna be Mickey?
SPEAKER_05No.
SPEAKER_04Poison.
SPEAKER_05Poison. Okay. So your weekly structure looks like this. It's five training days, one active recovery, and one full rest. So your day one and four. Okay, okay, okay. We've got seven days. Right. Yeah. I figured that one out.
SPEAKER_04That makes sense.
SPEAKER_05Uh day one and four of this week. So we've got if we start on Monday.
SPEAKER_04So it's like Rocky One and Rocky Four.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Monday and Thursday. Yes. This is what you're doing today.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Because we want to get you in shape real quick.
SPEAKER_04Wait, just two days?
SPEAKER_05It's seven days. It's but this is what you're doing on Monday and Thursday.
SPEAKER_04Okay, okay, okay, okay. I now I get it.
SPEAKER_05The focus is stamina and mental toughness.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Toughness. That's not still on now.
SPEAKER_01Toughness.
SPEAKER_05Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_01Toughness.
SPEAKER_05Um morning.
SPEAKER_02Sorry.
SPEAKER_05You should be fasted if possible. You run three to six kilometers. And that last five minutes needs to be sprint intervals. Okay?
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Your workout is jump rope for ten minutes. Shadow boxing? What is that?
SPEAKER_04Punching the air.
SPEAKER_05Punching shadows.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Three by three minute rounds. So three times for three minutes.
SPEAKER_04What what do I do for three minutes?
SPEAKER_05You box the shadows.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Uh heavy bag or substitute. Don't know. I is that the brrrrrrrrr thing, maybe.
SPEAKER_04Heavy bag, I guess. Isn't that the long one?
SPEAKER_05Maybe. I don't know.
SPEAKER_04I'm not sure. But you do that. It seems heavier.
SPEAKER_05Do that for five rounds, three minutes. Uh burpees. Can you do a push-up? Just wondering.
SPEAKER_04Maybe one, yes.
SPEAKER_05Maybe one. Okay. You gotta figure out how to do it 10 to 15 times.
SPEAKER_04Oh no.
SPEAKER_05For three rounds.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. He also does the one-hand.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, you gotta figure out how to do that. Uh mountain climbers. Do you know how to do that?
SPEAKER_04I'm guessing climbing a mountain.
SPEAKER_05Three times for 30 seconds.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05You better climb that mountain within 30 seconds.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, three times.
SPEAKER_05Three times. And the finisher is stairs or hill sprints. Five to ten rounds. So you gotta find some stairs.
SPEAKER_04Yes. I I think I can find stairs.
SPEAKER_05We can always find stairs.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. And then when you reach the top of the stairs, you do you jump around and celebrate.
SPEAKER_05Celebrate. And hopefully people are chasing you.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, and then uh they will uh build me a statue up there.
SPEAKER_05Maybe lucky.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, then I can uh uh take my uh motorcycle helmet and throw it at throw it at the statue.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Because I'm sad that my my uh coach is dead. Oh you wanna be my coach?
SPEAKER_05Am I your coach? What are you saying?
SPEAKER_04I don't know.
SPEAKER_05You want me to die?
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05I will coach you and then I will die. No, but sometimes these things happen. Yeah. If I end up being your coach, I'm gonna end up dying in the end.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Uh day two and five. So Tuesday and Friday.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05You work on strength. This is old school. Okay?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Full body power. Uh you do this circuit style.
SPEAKER_03So circus style.
SPEAKER_05Circuit.
SPEAKER_03Oh.
SPEAKER_05It's a circle.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Three to four times. Okay? Do all of these three to four times. Push-ups. At least 15.
SPEAKER_04Wow. Oh.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. You gotta figure out how to do 15 push-ups.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, that's gonna be a challenge.
SPEAKER_05Pull-ups or rows. Five to ten of them. Twenty squats.
SPEAKER_04Okay, maybe I can do that.
SPEAKER_05Walking lunges. Ten per leg. Dips on the bent. Or yeah, bench work.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, 10 to 15 of those. And then plank for 45 seconds. Okay. Can you hold a plank?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, for 45 seconds. Yeah. Yeah, no problem.
SPEAKER_05Okay, sure. Sorry. I mean uh add some rocky chaos here by carrying something heavy like bags, kids, groceries, and optional. Here's one for you. Chop some wood. Sled push, tire flips if available. You can do that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Day three. Boxing and core. Your focus is agility and abs. Do you have any of those?
SPEAKER_04Uh yeah.
SPEAKER_05Somewhere?
SPEAKER_04They're hidden.
SPEAKER_05In your closet? Collecting dust.
SPEAKER_04My abs are in my closet.
SPEAKER_05I left them in my closet. I figured I don't need these.
SPEAKER_04They're not ready to come out.
SPEAKER_05No. Jump rope for ten minutes. Footwork drills. Oh, that's when you jump and you do the boxing dance.
SPEAKER_04Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_05For ten minutes.
SPEAKER_04That looks fun.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Box the shadows again.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Four rounds for three minutes. And then heavy bag again. Six rounds for three minutes.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05I don't know. I don't know.
SPEAKER_03You don't know. I don't know. Reddit.
SPEAKER_05I don't know what it is. Uh then you work on your core Rocky abs. Core. Core. So uh three rounds of sit-ups, 25.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I think I can do that.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Sit-ups is Russian twists. Do you know what that is?
SPEAKER_04Twist the Russian?
SPEAKER_05Uh you don't twist the Russian, but you lay you like Oh, you do the twist.
SPEAKER_04Okay, okay. I didn't know that was called Russian twists.
SPEAKER_05But what do you call them? Do you have a name for them?
SPEAKER_04No, but I I've seen it.
SPEAKER_05If you could make up an if you could make up a name for this.
SPEAKER_04It's like when you do a sit-up.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, it's like half a sit-up and then you twist back and forth.
SPEAKER_04I would call it a sit-up twist.
SPEAKER_05A sit-up twist. Twisty sit-ups.
SPEAKER_04Twist up.
SPEAKER_05A twist-up. Twist and shout.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Do the twist. That's what he is talking about. It's a exercise song.
SPEAKER_04We're gonna dance. Oh no. No.
SPEAKER_05No, not no, it's a song promoting exercise.
SPEAKER_04Ah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Come on, baby. Do the twist. Twist. Twist. Yeah. Twist.
SPEAKER_04That's what they should play, uh, you know, for the montage in the movie.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. And and the Beatles are also promoting exercise by twisting and shouting.
SPEAKER_04I will definitely do that.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Alright. Leg raises. Three rounds of 15.
SPEAKER_04So raise my legs.
SPEAKER_05Raise your legs. That'll help what drives you, mad.
SPEAKER_04Like like a dog?
SPEAKER_05No.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_05No. You lay down flat and your legs go all the way up. Oh, okay. And then all the way down. And bicycle crunches.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Okay. Okay.
SPEAKER_05So that's that's that's another version of your sit-up twist.
SPEAKER_04Twist up.
SPEAKER_05But your elbow has to reach your knee. Oh, okay. Okay, like that. Okay. So that was your day three. That was on Wednesdays. Okay. You do your boxing. Day six, which is Saturday, which is active recovery. You go for a long walk, 45 to 90 minutes, a light stretch, and optional is an easy bike ride. Day seven, Sunday.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05That's full rest. No training. Eat well and recover.
SPEAKER_04Okay. I'm gonna like Sundays, I feel like. Yes.
SPEAKER_05Everyone likes Sundays. Here's some Rocky style habits that are realistic and not stupid. Totally not stupid. Okay. According to open eyes.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_05We're skipping. The raw eggs thing, that's how you get sick. Oh. Not strong. Apparently, you're not supposed to have raw eggs.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05You could get salmonella or something, right? So instead, you have your high protein meals with cooked eggs.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Chicken, fish, and kawaii. Yeah. Quelf. Quelf. Uh s I I knew the word in English. It's like skier or something. Skar. Skier? I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Your consistent meals are important for routine. So, like the same thing every day.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_05It's it's supposed to be basic, nothing fun.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05We're not eating for fun.
SPEAKER_01No.
SPEAKER_05We're eating to fuel. Okay. Okay. Water. You need to hydrate.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05The more you sweat, the more you need to drink. Water. Yeah. Water.
SPEAKER_02Hmm.
SPEAKER_05This is your I'm not even gonna bother response. Like I'm just throwing all of this information in the garbage as soon as it comes out.
SPEAKER_04Yep.
SPEAKER_05Okay.
SPEAKER_04I think the trash can is full now.
SPEAKER_05Oh, yeah, I guess so. Your progression plan is to uh uh week one and two, you keep your runs short, about two to three kilometers, and focus on finishing the workouts.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Finish the workouts.
SPEAKER_01Yes.
SPEAKER_05Don't just give up in the middle.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05You gotta do the whole thing. Weeks three and four, you increase your reps and rounds and add sprints. Oh. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And then week five and on, you push your intensity hard. And this is where it starts feeling like Rocky.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_05The real Rocky difference. This is the part people skip. Train even when you don't feel like it. Keep it simple. Repeat the basics until they're boring. Rocky didn't win because of a fancy program. He outworked everyone. He's that good.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
The Worst Workout Routine Ever
SPEAKER_05Okay. Now we're getting to the part that you probably can relate to more. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Uh watch movies.
SPEAKER_05So I asked, what is the worst workout routine you can come up with? Cool. Here we go. Okay. The worst workout routine ever. So in the morning, you have chaos cardio. You wake up after four to five hours of sleep, immediately sprint for 10 minutes without a warm-up, then jog 10 kilometers at random pace, start fast, and then crash halfway. Finish with a hundred burpees for no reason. Um, this is not good because of injury risk and burnout speed run.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. I mean, so far I I I it doesn't sound very nice.
SPEAKER_05No. Your breakfast is either nothing or two thousand calories of sugar.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05No consistency.
SPEAKER_04Okay. Sounds like me.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, yeah. Midday is a random strength nonsense. Nons nonsense. Nonsense. No. No, nonsense. Nonsense.
SPEAKER_04Nonsense.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_05Do this in completely random order. Okay. 200 push-ups.
SPEAKER_04Right.
SPEAKER_05200 push-ups.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05All at once with terrible form.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Five max.
SPEAKER_04That's I mean, that's how I do push-ups. Terrible form.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Five max deadlifts that are way too heavy.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05This is like trying too hard.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And it's backfiring.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it's gonna hurt my back too.
SPEAKER_05A three-hour plank attempt.
SPEAKER_04Uh three hours. Okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_05But you fail after two minutes and give up.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, probably. Yes.
SPEAKER_05I had in my schedule that I would plank for three hours.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, but uh I had other things to do.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. I came up with a whole list of other things that I could be doing right now.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_0550 bicep curls every 20 minutes for three hours. Okay. Uh your evening looks like this. You're just working out all day. Wow. There's no rest here.
SPEAKER_04I feel like this is much worse than the other one. So I yeah.
SPEAKER_05Uh 60 minutes of jump rope and trip constantly.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Can you jump rope?
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05I struggle.
SPEAKER_04I I mean I can do like maybe five. And I mean, it's not uh like it's very sloppy. It's not gracious. Not not gracious. That's the word I was looking for. And uh I um uh it's like I'm uh I'm jumping with flat feet.
SPEAKER_05Oh okay.
SPEAKER_04So that uh I'm so it's an earthquake. Yeah, it's like you don't hop on your toes.
SPEAKER_05No. Okay.
SPEAKER_04Um I don't know.
SPEAKER_05You don't know how to do that?
SPEAKER_04Uh I I it it never happens. I I I don't know I don't know. I don't think about that.
SPEAKER_05Okay. I just trip constantly. I can hardly do one without getting it around my ankles.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Uh 12 rounds of shadow boxing with no technique. So just randomly punching air. Punching air.
SPEAKER_04Punching shadows.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, I guess so.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Punch a wall or something equally dumb.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03Does it say that?
SPEAKER_05Yes.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05This is your bad workout routine includes punching a wall.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Just one wall, just once.
SPEAKER_04Okay. Just once.
SPEAKER_05Just once per day.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Because you have to do all of this every day.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, break your hand every day.
unknownYes.
SPEAKER_05And then you finish your overkill session with 500 sit-ups and zero stretching.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. You know what? I kinda like the first one better, actually.
SPEAKER_05Okay, okay. Just wait. Just wait. It's gonna get better for you.
SPEAKER_04Oh really?
SPEAKER_05But your night routine includes uh phone scrolling until two in the morning.
SPEAKER_04Okay, I like that.
SPEAKER_05Eat random snacks, and then panic about not seeing results.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I do that.
SPEAKER_05I already do that.
SPEAKER_04I'm good at this.
SPEAKER_05So far, so good. The key principles of this terrible plan are no rest days, no progression, max effort every day, terrible form, and no plan. And what would actually happen is week one, you would think I'm a machine. Week two, you'd be exhausted, sore, and demotivated. And by week three, quit completely or get injured. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04That's uh how I work out.
Chair Couch Bed Fitness Plan
SPEAKER_05So it's important to not just go all in. You need a plan. Uh okay. This last part that I have for you, if you don't have anything else after, I requested a workout for the lazy in a chair, on the couch, or in bed.
SPEAKER_04I like this. Yes.
SPEAKER_05Okay, so this is something that anyone could do. No matter who you are, you can always work out no matter where you are. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Uh I don't have to say it again. So the rule of this game is that you can do it while watching TV, scrolling, or listening to something. You don't have to change your clothes. There's no setup, and you aim for 10 to 20 minutes total.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Level one, in the chair. I barely want to move, is basically what you're thinking. You do one to two rounds of all of these things. Okay. Uh seated knee lifts. So you sit back and you lift one knee at a time. 20 to 40 times. Okay. That's not so bad.
SPEAKER_01I can do that.
SPEAKER_05Arm punches, slow or fast. You can sit and punch the air for 30 to 60 seconds.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, so like uh seated air punching.
SPEAKER_05Right. Yeah. Uh seated twists. So you do pretty much those Russian twists. Yeah, okay. Sit-up twists, twists up, twist-ups. Yeah. Uh, but you just like have your butt at the front of the seat and you lean back and you uh twist like that about 20 times. And then toe taps. You tap your feet quickly on the floor for 30 to 60 seconds. Like you're running. That's you running. Oh, that hurt. My calf has been hurting. I should not be doing this. Okay. This alone already wakes up your body more than doing nothing. Level two on the couch. Uh so you try a little bit. You do two to three rounds of all of this. Sit to stand. So you stand up and you sit down 10 to 15 times. Okay. Okay. I mean, that's quite the workout.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05That already is exhausting. Uh couch push-ups. You put your hands on the couch or on a chair and do eight to fifteen push-ups.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Uh seated leg extensions. So you straighten one leg at a time. I think sitting. Maybe. Uh 10 to 15 times.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_05And then shoulder raises with no weights are required. They're optional. Uh lift your arms to the side or the front. And do that 10 to 15 times. And then level three, I'm literally in bed. Which was what I was laughing at. Yeah. Doing exercises in bed. Uh, it doesn't say how many times, but I guess you get to decide.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. You fall asleep, I guess.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. This is a bedtime workout. Or first thing in the morning. The first one is glute squeezes. You squeeze your butt.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Tighten and hold for three seconds, 15 to 20 times. It's not so bad. Leg lifts, one at a time, 10 to 15 times each.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Mini crunches. You lift your shoulders slightly out of the bed. Like you're gonna get up.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Like I'm gonna get up. No. No, I'm not. I'm gonna get up. No. No, no, no. I'm getting nope, nope, no, no. You're fooling yourself. Yes, for 10 to 20 times. Pretend to get out of bed for at least 10 times.
SPEAKER_04I feel like that's a you know, a lot of the snoozers would do that.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, yeah. Um, this last one is called a dead bug. Do you know what that is?
SPEAKER_01No.
SPEAKER_05I'm gonna explain. Okay. Okay? I'm gonna explain the best I can verbally.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05Uh so you lay flat in your bed, and then you raise your arms and your legs straight up to the ceiling. And then you take the opposite side. So my right arm and my left leg are gonna go down, but the other ones stay up, and then you switch. Okay. You know? Okay. So that's that's for ten for each side.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_05Uh the only rule that matters here is to do something every day. Even five minutes, even five minutes, minus mines, minutes, minutes. Even five minutes beats zero. So to make this actually work, here's a trick. Okay, attach it to do to attach it to something you already do.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_05So, like you're watching Netflix or TV or something, make that your workout trigger. And you don't need a perfect plan, you just need to do something.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And I guess you can stop early if you want, because that builds momentum. I don't completely agree, but that's what it said.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05After a week, you can upgrade if you want by adding another round or slow down your reps, which makes it harder without more effort. And then after two to three weeks, if you really want to, you can add a short walk, five to ten minutes.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05But the reality of this is that it's not gonna turn you into Rocky Balboa.
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_05Sorry.
SPEAKER_01What the heck?
SPEAKER_05But it will build a habit, improve energy, and make it easier to level up later. Uh and honestly, people usually fail because they aim too high and not too low.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_05So yeah, that's all I had. Do you have any questions that I should add here?
SPEAKER_04I don't know. Do you have any questions?
SPEAKER_05I asked my questions. I'm asking you. It's your turn to ask the questions.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, but I'm thinking maybe you have questi other questions. You're allowed to have other questions.
SPEAKER_05No, I'm not.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Or was that good?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I think so.
SPEAKER_05That was your crash course on lazy exercise.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I I think I might do that.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, we'll see.
SPEAKER_04Maybe.
SPEAKER_05Well, you say that and then you never do, so I don't believe you.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_05You have to prove me wrong.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Here's a challenge.
SPEAKER_04But y I also said I might do that. So I I'm I'm not saying I'm definitely gonna do that.
SPEAKER_05Can I challenge you?
SPEAKER_04You can try.
SPEAKER_05Okay. I challenge you to do at least one of these. But then if chair, couch, or bed every day until next Thursday.
SPEAKER_04Okay. But then you need to send me a list. I will send it to you. Yeah. Okay.
SPEAKER_05Yeah? Yeah. That's all. Yeah. That's it. You do one little exercise or workout per day. You choose which one until Thursday. Yeah. And then we will uh update the listeners on how it's going for you. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Alright.
SPEAKER_04Alright.
SPEAKER_05Is that all?
SPEAKER_04I guess so.
What’s Ruining Our Lives
SPEAKER_05Okay. Well, if we're all done here.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. As we reach the end of this episode, please tell me what is ruining your life.
SPEAKER_04I need to think about that. Okay. I'm I'm guessing it's uh it is my lack of uh uh exercise and uh and my laziness. I'm uh I ha uh I have no one else to blame but me.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_04But uh that's how it is. So it's ruining my life and I should be better, but I'm not.
SPEAKER_05Lack of activity. Yup.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05You need to get motivated. Yeah. Bruh. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04But we don't uh meet very often nowadays.
SPEAKER_05No, I'm busy. Yeah. I'm doing things.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. It's easier to when you have someone else to do it with, you know, go for walks and everything. Yeah. It's not as fun doing it by yourself.
SPEAKER_05No.
SPEAKER_04So I'm gonna ask you, what's ruining your life?
SPEAKER_05School.
SPEAKER_04Oh.
SPEAKER_05I think. I I feel like I'm not doing very good in the classes that I'm in right now. And it makes me kind of sad. Um one of them I knew was gonna be really hard. The other one was shockingly a lot harder than I expected.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05So yeah, I uh I'm gonna say that.
SPEAKER_04And I mean you even uh when you did a test, you got the wrong Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_05I guess that's also what's ruining my life is that I was supposed to I did take a math test earlier this week, and then after I finished the test, and I mean I haven't been studying that hard. No. I I've been skipping some pages in my book because I just one, I have zero interest, and two, I have zero time. So I've been like skimming through the pages and doing the problems that I want to do.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And so I wasn't that surprised when I was taking the test and I didn't really understand a lot of what I was doing, but I did my best. It was the test for the second chapter instead of the first one. Yeah, okay. So now I have to redo, or not even redo, I have to do the test that I was supposed to do.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05I took the wrong test.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, and it wasn't your fault.
SPEAKER_05It wasn't my fault. Uh well, it was both of our faults, myself and the teacher, because neither of us read the paper that said it was for the second chapter. Oh, okay. Instead of the first. So yeah, that's that. Okay.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_05Are you all out of sips?
SPEAKER_04Almost. Like half.
SPEAKER_05Be out of sips.
SPEAKER_04Um all out of sips, and that means we're all out of episode.
SPEAKER_05Would you like to wrap this up?
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Sounds like a good idea.
SPEAKER_05All right. Thank you for listening to Roasty Toasty Ghosty. The most amazing uh podcast in the world, in which you will learn nothing at all.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Right? Did we learn anything today?
SPEAKER_04I don't think so, really.
SPEAKER_05I think we learned some fun ways to exercise without going to the gym.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, and weren't doing much at all. And also how not to exercise.
SPEAKER_05Yes. Yes.
SPEAKER_04Um and I wouldn't do that.
SPEAKER_05No.
SPEAKER_04Anyway, so I thought the the ways not to exercise would be like being lazy, but that sounded more like that's too much.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, it was the try-hard version of exercising, which in the end it doesn't work at all.
SPEAKER_01No.
Subscribe Socials And Goodbye
SPEAKER_05Okay. If you made it this far, you clearly like us. So hit subscribe and don't miss next week's episode, which comes out on Tuesday.
SPEAKER_04Yes.
SPEAKER_05As usual. Um, all right, have a good life.
SPEAKER_04Yes. See you next week.
SPEAKER_05Alright, bye-bye.
SPEAKER_04Bye-bye.
SPEAKER_05Thank you for listening to the Roasty Toasty Ghostie Podcast.
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SPEAKER_05And Twitch at Roasty Toasty Ghosty Podcast, where we play live man lives every month.
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SPEAKER_05We hope you enjoyed this episode just as we enjoyed making it.
SPEAKER_04And we'll be back with another one next Tuesday on a podcast provider near you.
SPEAKER_05Goodbye, Matthias.
SPEAKER_04Goodbye, Lauren.